Thursday, July 18, 2013

Facebook Envy

Recently I found out that an acquaintance refers to me as "Perfect Mom".

I don't think she meant it as a compliment.

I have to admit, I was kind of hurt by this "perfect mom" comment. I felt like I was being judged and made fun of, based only by my social networking image.

This person only really knows me through my social networks. They see my facebook status updates and check-ins and can scroll through my Instagram photos. They can read HerMamas and my personal blog. This person has come to the conclusion that I live a perfect life, with my perfect husband and my 2 perfect children. Of course I had to laugh at it all because my life is far from perfect. Like many people I tend to post about happy and fun things. This does not mean that our lives are not filled with hardship and struggle.

Facebook Envy is a real thing. 

There are studies that show that facebook envy can affect a person's self-esteem. Reading posts about your friends taking amazing trips, posting photos of their adorable babies and sharing photos from a picture perfect wedding day can make a person feel like their lives are dull and boring in comparison. People can sometimes obsess over the seemingly perfect lives other people are leading.

A few things to remember....

  • Life is not a competition. Don't set the bar for your goals and accomplishments based on other peoples. 
  • Social Media is like a photo album, people are usually only showing the highlights of their life. This does not mean that their lives are only sunshine and rainbows. 
  • When looking through Instagram remember most photos are posed (even if they look candid!) 
  • Use the time you spend focusing on other people's lives, to improve your own. 
Have you ever had Facebook envy? 


  1. Couldn't agree more that folks who are positive end up pigeonholded with: "oh, they think they're perfect". Positivity doesn't equate perfection. I put everything on social media. It's my scrapbook, but like a scrapbook, it's filled with happy moments, smiles and laughter! Who fills their photo books with pictures of crying babies? So I won't stop posting as I do because I know that those with Facebook envy can easily unfollow! Yay, for that! Great post, Elissa!

  2. "Social Media is like a photo album, people are usually only showing the highlights of their life. This does not mean that their lives are only sunshine and rainbows. " That's a great point.

  3. Replies
    1. Thanks Matty! I know you love me the most. Love you too!

  4. Great reminder! Life isn't about perfection, it's about living. Of course most of us just post the good stuff on fb!! I've had to remind myself this while wishing I was away in Costa Rica instead of dealing with sick kids. lol

  5. I felt as if I was spending way too much time on facebook, slightly envious of moms that have time to go out for dates with their husbands, travel and have active social lives outside of children. When I realized being connected made me feel even worse, I deleted my profile. I wrote about it on my blog here


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