Friday, February 15, 2013

Let's talk about SEX!

So you get into a relationship and if all goes well there's great sexual chemistry. When I began dating my husband we very much took full advantage of the "honeymoon" stage! Ideally, that period of a relationship is where a healthy sex life blossoms, setting the stage for years down the road where couples settle into a slightly less exciting but outrageously fulfilling married life!

For the hubby and I, as much as we might have thought marriage wouldn't change our sex lives, it did. Sex became less spontaneous and at times less frequent, but it is still a priority for our marriage like paying the bills or arranging child care. Though definitely NOT as boring as those mundane tasks. Sometimes finding the time to have sex feels like finding the time to get to that dental appointment which is probably the case for most crazy-busy, married couples with kids. We suddenly have way more to worry about then spending the day in bed let alone engaged in sleepless nights of lovemaking. Don't get me wrong! Sex can and should still be amazing when it happens, but things change and that's okay! What isn't okay is being unfilled in your sex-life because of life's lame excuses... it's too late, you're so busy, you're tired. Do what it takes to do it, ha! Which could quite possibly mean sex turns into sneaking away for a "shower" together while the kids nap or maybe you lock the door just long enough to go unnoticed by your nosy offspring.

One thing the hubby and I learned from a church retreat of all places, is to ask children who are old enough to give you time alone for each other. Literally ask older children to watch younger children for an hour so that "mommy and daddy can be alone." I love the idea of modeling that couples need time to themselves and privacy. After all, I want my children to build healthy adult relationships too, even in my daydreams my only daughter doesn't actually do that until she's about 45 years old, once she's taken over the world! Hey, a mom can dream!

Bottom line, couples should invest in keeping sex a priority of marriage. Embrace those intimate moments alone and make sure they're filled with what BOTH partners enjoy and need! Men and women often want different things when it comes to sex, so a willingness to TALK about your sex life and compromise goes a long way. Oh and one last thing to note... HAVE FUN!

Quick... the kids will be back in 5 minutes!


At HerMamas.com we're not experts in the field of sex or relationships, but we're definitely a community hoping to support every woman! So share your sex questions with us by commenting below or sending us your emails! We'd also love to hear your take on making sex a priority in building a good relationship! Share your stories TODAY!

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