Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Do you freak-out about milestones?


My 14 mos. old isn't actually spiderman. In fact, it doesn't seem like he's ready to walk anytime soon. They say never compare your children to each other, but there I was constantly comparing my youngest to his older brother and sister who both walked right before 12 months. My daughter was actually running at her 1st birthday party! 

Now maybe this is all payback. When my little one was about 6 to 8 months I kept calling him "my lazy baby." I'm not winning "mother of the year" for admitting that, but I did feel he was taking his sweet time to sit up, roll over and crawl. Truth is I was comparing him to his siblings and peers. Now every parent doesn't actually refer to their kid as "lazy" but I'm sure many have been there and worried about milestones that place our child's development on some chart in the doctor's office. But those makers are simply that - markers. With my first, I would actually consider those markers the end all when they shouldn't be and whether other first-time parents like to admit it or not, we often freak-out when it comes to milestones. 

Recently I got to thinking that calling my little one "lazy" is a form of freaking-out and isn't necessary.  So he's still crawling at 14 mos. with no signs of walking anytime soon and that's ok! He's actually quite the speed-crawling pro who'd probably take 1st place in a diaper-dash.

First-time mom and pops (and even those not so new ones like myself) should give our little ones TIME! Soon enough it'll feel like they're crawling walls like spidey. What serves me instead of freaking out is appreciating these moments that linger. As of late I've really enjoyed how the longer it takes my little guy to walk the longer I get to ENJOY the baby that he still is. And what's so wrong with having a 14 month old who still wants his momma to carry him around? Now, I'm not saying ignore milestones. They are there for a reason and you can always bring up concerns with your child's doctor, but rest assured that comparing and rushing doesn't make reaching milestones any easier - for anyone.

Any stories you'd like to share about milestone freak-outs? We've all been there... so go ahead and share those stories with us by commenting below. Better yet how about sharing the other not-so-glamorous milestones like the 1st time your kid places their hand inside the toilet boil to create their own little whirlpool? I'll be the 1st to admit my "non-walker" is very, very good at that!   

4 comments:

  1. I did that too~ My little girl who is now 3, turning 4 in april she didnt walk til after her first birthday either! While my good friend had a little girl 2 months older. She took longer to crawl too and to sit up and to roll over. Also to sit up and roll over. My friends little girl was crawling and walking before her, and I was like cammmooon Nicole...you can do it. Also called her my "lazy baby". Also at day care they had gave her some speech therapy. Now at 3 and a half she is walking, running, jumping, doing flips, talks all the time. It all comes with time. When she went to speech therapy the woman told me she was fine. Right now she is just finally doing really good with potty training. I was worried about that too because she is starting school in september and I dont want her to be like my niece and miss her first year because shes not potty trained. Shes got a hang of it now. During the day anyways. Night time we are working on. Just took her baby cups away at night time. Baby cup fairy came and took her baby cups. I think we all worry about milestones cause there are so many expectations.Really though we shouldnt because kids will learn and develop at their own pace.

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    1. Well said Jolene. My kids both were late walkers, each at about 16 months. They both got teeth late too (10 months!). With my first daughter I worried about it and tried to encourage her and help her practice walking. With my second I enjoyed every non-mobile moment we had. I learned that as long as my doctor was not concerned I shouldn't be either.

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  2. For me when it comes to milestones, I try not to dwell too much. My daughter was late in reaching all hers. She is developmentally delayed and I had to learn(still in the process) not to compare her to anyone. All babies are different delayed or not and they will reach them when they are ready ;) So when she rolled over, crawled, talked, walked, etc for the first time it was such a celebration! To me, it just made me feel that much more proud because she has overcome so much and has been able to do it. And yes its also fun to enjoy the milestones that linger because they won't be little forever :( I remember I couldn't wait until she would say her first word now I can't get her to be quiet lol

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    1. Haha. That reminds me of my oldest daughter. She refused to say "Mom". Even at 2 years old, when she could talk in full sentences she wouldn't say it. I was sometimes referred to as "hey you". I kept saying "If she just said it I promise to never get tired of it" HAHAHAHA. Now its "MOM MOM MOM MOM" all day long.

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